7 Empowering Tips to Improve Your Body Image

I am delighted to share with you a wonderful piece contributed to this blog by my colleague and positive body image ally,  Margarita Tartakovsky, MS, author of Weightless, a blog about body image, the skinny fad and freedom from numbers.

It’s not easy living in today’s thin-is-in society. Thanks to trashy weeklies, women’s magazines and flashy ads, we’re surrounded by diet and exercise tips and tricks. We’ve got many an orange monster (the nonsensical Weight Watchers gremlin comes to mind!) to contend with, furnishing us with the tools to – slowly but surely – chip away at our body image. But whether it’s the media molding your image, a tough past, years of self-doubt or something else entirely, your body image may feel like a house of cards. One drafty window, and it all falls down.  

Developing a positive body image takes time, but it’s possible – for everyone. You can start to rebuild your body image, one solid brick at a time. That’s a fact! Here are seven empowering ways to improve your body image.

1.      Consider the impact. Take some time to reflect on how your body image has affected other areas of your life. How does your body image affect your relationships, your work, and overall self-image? Does it prevent you from accomplishing professional goals? Try to brainstorm two ways your body image has impacted your life negatively.

Understanding how deep your body dissatisfaction runs and how it directs your life can be empowering, because diagnosing the problem gets you several steps closer to a solution. Once you realize the effects of a negative body image, you can begin to repair it.

2.      See the whole you. Many of us complain about our thunderous thighs, bulging bellies and jiggly arms. One body part may plague us for days, months or even years. Why can’t I just firm up my arms? Why isn’t dieting getting rid of the rolls around my stomach? I can’t stand how flabby my legs are.

Many of us rarely look at ourselves as a whole person. We pick apart our bodies and nit-pick at every supposed flaw. Instead, empower yourself to see the entire you. You are more than a belly, butt or breasts. Practice standing in front of the mirror without breaking your body into parts. See the whole you, in all your beautiful glory.

3.      Cultivate a positive body image from the inside. Many of us rely on external factors to make or break our body image. Within minutes, a magazine image may make us doubt our appearance. An article about dieting and exercise might make us feel worse. Within seconds, an attractive, thinner woman may make us rethink what we should eat for lunch. So can the number on the scale.

But what if you worked toward a body image that was relatively resistant to outside influences? Sure, nothing is completely impervious but you can work to make your body image something that’s stable and doesn’t bend and fold to every magazine image, article, thinner person and weight fluctuation.

One way, which may seem silly at first, is to imagine yourself surrounded by thick armor (I’m talking about the kind a king’s knights would wear). At first, negative thoughts might be automatic: Look, she’s so much thinner than I am. That magazine cover talks about a new diet. I really need to try that and lose weight fast. When they come in, picture your super-strength suit of armor not letting any negative thoughts penetrate it. Your mindset, your emotions and your heart are protected with the finest steel. A body-bashing thought comes at you but simply bounces off your armor, falling flat and defeated onto the ground.

4.      Fake it till you make it. Though empowering yourself by lying (i.e., faking a positive body image) doesn’t exactly seem like the most authentic option, give it a try. Here’s what I mean: Many of us wait till we’ve lost five or 50 pounds to feel confident, to be proud of ourselves, to buy better-fitting clothes. Many of us think that happiness is just around the corner when we shed the weight. Many of us think we’ll be kinder to ourselves and take better care of ourselves once we’re thin enough. Because that’s when we’ll actually deserve it.

But let’s pretend that you’re there. You’ve reached whatever goal you need to in order to give yourself permission to feel good. Mark off one day this week when you’re going to be confident, when you’re going to feel 100 percent proud of being in your own skin. You’ll walk, talk and hold your head high, as though you are a confident person with a healthy body image.

At the end of this day, reflect on how you felt. Did feeling confident improve your day? Your mood? Maybe you felt like you could accomplish anything? Maybe you were nicer to yourself? How empowering did it feel to embrace yourself as you are?

5.      Change your mentality. Our society values a slim silhouette, oftentimes at the cost of health. But when we change our mindset and our vocabulary, we empower ourselves to build a better body image. When we realize that thin isn’t the goal, we empower ourselves to pursue good self-care. When we realize that diets don’t work, we put the focus back on listening to our bodies’ internal hunger cues, of eating all foods in moderation. When we realize that working out isn’t about weight loss, but about moving our bodies, releasing feel-good endorphins, building endurance, alleviating stress and helping our hearts, we enjoy the process. We no longer view eating or exercising as punishing, negative activities.

In fact, it becomes a beautiful cycle: You focus on being healthy, and do things that help you feel better about yourself. You eat healthier, enjoy everything in moderation, choose activities that make you feel stronger, that you actually enjoy. Because you’re taking care of yourself, your mood improves and you look healthier. And you start to enjoy life more, without the heavy-on-your-chest pressure of having to lose weight or look a certain way.  

6.      Build an empowerment kit. What makes you feel empowered? Is it doing a certain workout? Reading one of your favorite books? Talking to a close friend? Lifting weights? Writing in your journal?

Create a kit with all the things that make you feel empowered. This may be a big box with your fave books, a list of inspirational quotes, a list of your fave activities that more often than not make you feel fantastic, a family photo album, a classical CD, a funny movie, a workout DVD, a friend’s phone number and your journal. When you feel like the power has been drained from you and your body image is shaky, go to your kit.

7.      Focus on strong female role models. Nowadays, we turn to actresses for our outward inspiration – how we dress, what we look like, whose arms, legs and lips we want. Instead, think about the many accomplished, strong women from history and today. What woman do you admire for her accomplishments, strength, character, resolve?

Margo Maine, Ph.D, and Joe Kelly, write in their book, The Body Myth: Adult Women and The Pressure to Be Perfect, “women of substance help us remember what really counts: the inner self, values, beliefs, morals, and the ability to love. With this insight, we may gradually see our entire female experience differently and consider letting go of our food, weight, and body image obsessions.” Rather than reading a fashion magazine, the authors encourage women to pick up a book on women’s history, noting that this information will be much more valuable than the latest articles on being “sexier, skinner and ‘more successful.’” In fact, according to the authors, by appreciating women’s accomplishments, we also shake up society’s standards of success and self-worth. Realizing that being skinny is irrelevant to our self-worth is tremendously empowering.