Women's Community Counsellor

August 2006

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We're All Winners

On June 28, I was awarded for being one of Vancouver Island’s “Top 40 Under 40” at a Gala dinner and ceremony at the Laurel Point Inn in Victoria. It was an honour and a privilege to receive this award and a fab party! So as I sit down to write this, I’m thinking, how many of us women see ourselves as winners and as ‘outstanding’ in whatever we do in life? I mean, honestly, how many of us truly think we’re “all that and a bag of chips”?

While many things pain me greatly, (like the exploitation and destruction of the planet, war, hunger, poverty, etc.), one of the greatest tragedies I see today is girls and women not blossoming and becoming everything that they dream of being and are capable of. If I think about it too much, it makes me cry.

Being a therapist day-in and day-out, I have the blessing of meeting a multitude of bright, talented, and fabulous girls and women who have become somehow ‘derailed’ from their life’s purpose and are instead turning their anger, frustration, and sadness inward and in effect, beating themselves up emotionally (and often physically too, through various addictions and other self-harming behaviours).

I see my job as reminding these people of who they really are and what they’re capable of. Women are so wise and brilliant, so why do we so often lose our way and forget why we were put here on earth in the first place? Maybe there isn’t a satisfactory answer, but perhaps we can stop doing this and reclaim and own our place in the world? I believe that this is doable and possible and I invite you to do the same.

To get you started in this vein, I want to give you a little bit of FUN homework…

I want you to design an award for yourself- get right into it. If you were to win a single award for something that you are fabulous at and have worked hard to become, what would it be for? If you’re stuck, interview your girlfriends and supportive family members and ask them
what they think you’d win for.

Secondly, MAKE the award for yourself and have others help you make it. Better yet, do this exercise with a group of other fabulous women who need a boost. You can even frame the awards and conduct a special awards ceremony honouring each other.

Once you’ve completed this exercise, I would be thrilled if you would e-mail me your thoughts and feelings about doing it and I can put your answers on my website or else in another e-zine (with or without your name: it’s up to you). I’d love to hear how it went for you and to share it with other women who could benefit from your inspiration and courage and self-loving behaviour. E-mail me at: esther@estherkane.com.

And remember, we are all winners!!!!!

Big hugs,

Esther

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Esther Kane, MSW, RCC relocated to the Comox Valley over two years ago from Vancouver. She is in full-time private practise as a psychotherapist in Courtenay. Esther has over a decade of experience counselling women and their loved ones with a multitude of presenting problems. Her main focus is helping women to become free of barriers which keep them stuck so that they can become all that they dream of being. To book a session or to set up a free 15-minute phone consultation, call Esther at 250.338.1800. Or e-mail her at: esther@estherkane.com. You can check out her detailed website at: www.estherkane.com.

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