Women's Community Counsellor
Volume 1, Issue 4 - Winter 2005

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In this issue:

• Featured Article: Radical Self-Acceptance?
  
  
• About Esther Kane

Radical Self-Acceptance

I must openly admit that this is NOT my concept- I have borrowed it from one of my greatest mentors named “SARK” who writes about this in her fabulous book that I feel every woman should have, “Succulent Wild Woman: Dancing with your wonder-full self!” Here is what she has to say about Radical Self-Acceptance (pages 111-112):

Whenever I hear the term self-acceptance, I usually think, “Yeah, after I lose that weight, improve the cellulite, trim those thighs, meditate more often, be more fun to be with.” I propose a new way; RADICAL SELF-ACCEPTANCE.

• Do not stand in front of your mirror and accept what you see.
• Wear large pajamas and stay in bed all day and night Buy or borrow self-improvement books, but don’t read them. Stack them around your bedroom and use them as places to rest bowls of cookies.
• Watch exercise shows on t.v., but don’t do the exercises. Practise believing that the benefit lies imagining yourself doing the exercises.
• Don’t power walk. Saunter slowly in the sun, eating chocolate, and carry a blanket so you can take a nap.
• Stop looking at cellulite. Only view your body from the angles that don’t show it.
• Women are very good at shining kindness outward, yet if you ask how kind they are to themselves, they often cry.
• Turn the kindness spotlight inward.
• Before we can move to healthier ways, we must be where we actually are. Radical self-acceptance is a connecting, soft, slow, and compassionate way of being.
• We can help each other. When you see your “sister” beating up on herself, take her weapons away and just hold her.
• When you watch animals, you see only self-acceptance. Find ways to expand radical self-acceptance in your life. Adopt a friend and exchange stories of self-acceptance.
• So often, we trade stories of how bad we’ve been, or are. Shift the focus. Describe the ways you learned to accept yourself today - or last week.

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Esther Kane, MSW, RCC relocated to the Comox Valley over two years ago from Vancouver. She is in full-time private practise as a psychotherapist in Courtenay. Esther has over a decade of experience counselling women and their loved ones with a multitude of presenting problems. Her main focus is helping women to become free of barriers which keep them stuck so that they can become all that they dream of being. To book a session or to set up a free 15-minute phone consultation, call Esther at 250.338.1800. Or e-mail her at: esther@estherkane.com. You can check out her detailed website at: www.estherkane.com.

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