I am so delighted to share my collaboration with Dr. Vera Tarman, expert in food addiction and author of what I think is the best book on the subject, Food Junkies. I’d like to start this article with this interview my mother, Marion Kane did with Dr. Tarman a while back which is both entertaining and informative: https://www.marionkane.com/podcast/abstinence-helps-food-addicts/ What follows is an excerpt from chapter two of Food Junkies wherein Dr. Tarman shares her own story of food addiction and outlines her theory on food addiction. I highly recommend you buy this book as there is so much more in it that can help you if you struggle with food addiction. EATING, EATING, EATING: WHAT IS THE PROBLEM WITH ME? It is […]
Why I Love Millennials
Being born in 1971, I am a typical “Gen X’r”. Here’s a good definition of us. I fit this definition perfectly. My parents divorced when I was 4, I was a latchkey kid splitting my time between my mum’s house and my dad’s (hence why I wore two keys around my little neck), wildly independent, and left to my own devices for the most part. The Muppets provided company when I got home from school while I ate a snack I made in the kitchen. Like many of my generation whose parents were non-conforming hippies, I felt like we experienced what I like to call “free range parenting”: Our parents were not so concerned about our whereabouts and the intricacies […]
How to Get a Good Night’s Sleep
A lot of my clients struggle with sleep and ask me for tips on how they can get a deeper, longer, and rejuvenating night’s rest. I’ve done a lot of research and personal trial and error with sleep, and here are some tricks that work for a lot of people you can try. Esther’s Ten Top Tips on Developing Healthy Sleep Habits Establish a sleep schedule and stick to it Many of us have a hard time doing this because we’re glued to the latest Netflix series, computer game, or even caught up in a challenging crossword puzzle. However, the fact remains that like little children, we all function better with a set routine- and that includes going to […]
Esther’s Recommended Movie: Dumplin’
As an Eating Disorders Therapistand Body Image Warrior, I was absolutely delighted to watch the incredible movie “Dumplin” on Netflixrecently. I declare it the best body-positive film of 2018 and feel it will pave the way for many more like it. I’m usually not a huge fan of Jennifer Aniston, but she was spectacular in her role as a single mother of a bodacious teen girl navigating her way through a fat-phobic culture in the heart of Texas. I also loved it because Dolly Parton was one of the main focuses of the movie and I’m a huge Dolly Parton fan and used to listen to her records when I was a kid and sing along. I thought I wanted […]
How to Build Resilience Within Yourself Starting Right Now
In this piece, I want to talk about the power of resilience- an incredible power and quality that all of us possess. Sometimes, we don’t know we have it until we’re put to the test. I come from a long line of resilient women and have written about their incredible struggles and triumphs: The Reluctant Matriarch My Mum and her mum In Memory of Granny Ruth on Mother’s Day One of the best pieces on resilience came to me via a two-minute video someone sent me called: 4 life lessons from Auschwitz survivor Dr. Edith Eger Watch the video before reading the rest of this article to hear her invaluable tips and then I’ll go through each tip separately, gleaning the […]
Homework for the Holidays: Study Your Family-of-Origin
I am well aware by witnessing the angst all around me, that the winter festivities and get-togethers are in full swing. Between obligatory work parties, friends’ gatherings, and family dinners, some people feel like running off to the woods and holing up in a cabin until the whole thing is over. I’ve spoken before on how to successfully navigate family holiday gatherings, so if you need a primer, listen to me being interviewed about this topic- It’s the fifth interview down called “Surviving Family Over the Holidays”. Also, if you’re concerned with dealing with people other than family over the holidays, read this: Letting Go of Other People’s “Stuff” During the Holidays Another helpful article I was interviewed for: An […]
Best Resources on Perimenopause: The Power of Progesterone
At the age of 47, I am surfing the high and low tides of perimenopause. And let me tell you something sisters- it’s a really rocky ride at times and I feel like I’m white-knuckling it. I’ve talked to countless women about this stage of life and I have come to realise that we are unique in how we experience it. The biggest clue to figure out what it’s going to look like for you is to ask your mother how it was for her. The medical professionals I’ve spoken to tell me that biologically, we follow in our mother’s peri/menopausal footsteps. For me, it’s an unfortunate torch to carry as my own mother went through somewhat of a personal hell […]
Esther’s Recommended Read on Resilience: Broken Open
I have become particularly interested lately in Resiliency Theory because after being a therapist for over 20 years, I am still gobsmacked by what traumas and losses people can handle and overcome. Here is my favourite definition of resilience from the American Psychological Association: Resilience is the process of adapting well in the face of adversity, trauma, tragedy, threats or significant sources of stress — such as family and relationship problems, serious health problems or workplace and financial stressors. It means “bouncing back” from difficult experiences. Research has shown that resilience is ordinary, not extraordinary. People commonly demonstrate resilience. One example is the response of many Americans to the September 11, 2001 terrorist attacks and individuals’ efforts to rebuild their lives. Being resilient does […]
One Woman’s Incredible Journey Through Grief
In a previous article, one reader shared her “dark night of the soul”. In this article, another reader, professional writer, and good friend of mine, shares hers. From personal experience, and having known Maryanne since her husband John’s death, I am here to tell you she is one of the most resilient, wise, and loving people I have ever met in my entire life. She had taught me, and so many others about overcoming a tragic loss and rebuilding a life based on meaning and purpose. Mind Your Grief: When a Traumatic Event Leads to Mental Health Issues My experience with mental health issues was the result of a traumatic event. In September 2000, my police officer husband, John, died in […]
Choosing Happiness: Positive Psychology
One of the founders of Positive Psychology is Martin Seligman who is famous for his experiments and theory of learned helplessness. If you’ve taken Psychology 101, you’ll remember this slightly disturbing but fascinating study he conducted on dogs: In Part 1 of this study, three groups of dogs were placed in harnesses. Group 1 dogs were simply put in a harnesses for a period of time and were later released. Groups 2 and 3 consisted of “yoked pairs“. Dogs in Group 2 were given electric shocks at random times, which the dog could end by pressing a lever. Each dog in Group 3 was paired with a Group 2 dog; whenever a Group 2 dog got a shock, its paired […]
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