From the vantage point of my therapy chair, I can often sense lots of emotions coming up in the person seated across from me, even if they aren’t necessarily showing what they’re feeling on the surface. When I checked in with a client recently who I sensed was angry, she said, “I AM angry. Really angry! I don’t know what to do with this feeling.” At that moment, the image of a volcano came to me: On the surface, my client was the calm-looking solid volcano, but brimming beneath the volcano’s surface was red-hot lava bubbling and churning and wanting to explode. I see this a lot with women- especially when it comes to identifying and dealing with anger. But […]
A lot of my clients struggle with sleep and ask me for tips on how they can get a deeper, longer, and rejuvenating night’s rest. I’ve done a lot of research and personal trial and error with sleep, and here are some tricks that work for a lot of people you can try. Esther’s Ten Top Tips on Developing Healthy Sleep Habits Establish a sleep schedule and stick to it Many of us have a hard time doing this because we’re glued to the latest Netflix series, computer game, or even caught up in a challenging crossword puzzle. However, the fact remains that like little children, we all function better with a set routine- and that includes going to […]
I’m sharing this as a bonus article for Christmas because I am working with a number of women who are estranged from their adult children at the moment and dreading Christmas. One of my readers sent me this inspirational story which transformed this theme from one of deep loss and pain into happiness at this emotionally-charged time of the year. If you feel someone you know could benefit from her experience, please pass this onto them. One Woman’s Positive Reframe on Christmas I have been estranged from two of my adult children for three years now. I never imagined feeling joy again without them. So for me to be sitting here today writing about joy in my life and healing […]
I thought that a good follow-up article to my last one, Being Mindful with Technology, would be a thought-provoking treatise on why I live in a cellphone-free household. Interestingly, when I did a Google search for “stats on cellphone free households Canada”, all that came up were articles on how the majority of Canadian households have cellphones and not landlines…not exactly what I was after. If I was to throw out a rough guesstimate of how many Canadian households are cellphone-free, I would say 10-15% and that would probably be higher than the actual number. To give you a sense of how bizarre it seems to most people when my husband and I tell them neither of us owns a […]
In my previous article, I shared my own personal story of choosing to be child-free. Right around the same time, another therapist, Ann Davidman, contacted me about a book she had just written which she thought would appeal to my readers and clients- she was right! The book is called, Motherhood – Is It For Me? Your Step-by-Step Guide to Clarity and I highly recommend it to any woman/couple who is seriously considering parenthood in their future. I asked Ann to give us some background on how this book came into being: The Motherhood-Is It For Me? story began in 1991 when my colleague, collaborator, and co-author, Denise L. Carlini, and I met as MFT (marriage and family therapist) interns. […]
A therapist offers hope in troubling times and tools for diminishing fear and hatred and replacing it with compassion, peace, and love.